Even Brittany Spears shows more ... it's not even close.
T HE ABSURD TIMES
Illustration: He is your only defense against the deep state
THE ABSURD TIMES
The time has come to put to rest all this blather about the maga morons cavorting about in our Congress. So, people voted for them. People also enrolled in Trump University. Still, not one publication from any graduate in a peer-reviewed journal and, also, not one billionaire generated by the now-defunct institution (ruled against by a Judge with obvious Hispanic background). Not one worthwhile development has been generated by this congress and most legislation passed is marked by its cruelty to people under its thumb. They are all con men and cowardly thieves or fools and suckers. Nobody taken in by that crowd will abandon their position and nobody who finds it obnoxious will change their minds. There is no point in continuing a list of absurdities now as they will continue to pile up no matter what we do legally.
So, it is time to issue this final mention of their idiocy for whatever laughs we can derive from it and then move on to more challenging fare.
TWATA: It should never be forgotten that misfortune is the world in which we live.
BYE BYE MAGA
I learned or decided that I had been asking these fools the wrong question. I had been explaining the implications of the word “again” which indicated a specific time in the past when it had been “great”. All I was asking, really, was when the past greatness happened, the past that the grifter-in-chief was going to return us to. Just a simple request for information, that’s all. Well, they would disappear without answering. They never returned.
I finally realized, or at least experimented a bit, and figured out that the confusion was a simple spelling error. MAGA is really WAWA (Make America White Again). The very idea of an African American as President was enough to launch this upheaval. The fact that he was intelligent and witty merely made things worse. Furthermore, at one White House Reporter’s Dinner, Obama talked a bit about Donald and he seethed in humiliation. No one had ever talked like that to or about him. He was so deconstructed as after he was elected no telecast of those dinners ever appeared again. Now, you should know that the idea of Trump being in office at all was thought up by Richard Nixon compounded matters, and when asked Trump said “If I did run, it would be as a Republican because their voters were more stupid”. This was in the 70s and I seem to remember Hunter Thompson mentioning this. Back then, the electorate was about 80% white.
Now, we need to understand the wisdom of the modern Republican Party and their insights. For one thing, nobody had noticed that the Barbie Doll was a communist. This came out in Congress. I certainly never knew about this. It is possible that she is “Woke” as well, but I have not heard that confirmed. There is now a black barbie as well.
We learned not to drink Bud Lite (who in their right mind drinks any “LITE” beer? Pay the same and get less of a buzz? Oh well, onward.
Another fact that we never realized was that slavery was good as it taught job skills. Sure, people got whipped, raped, and tortured, but they also learned valuable job skills – I haven’t found out what they were, but I guess slavery has been given a bad rap. I didn’t know it was an educational opportunity. I did hear some reference to being a blacksmith.
I learned that there is no law against teaching about Rosa Parks and her refusal to sit in the back of the bus. The only restriction is in mentioning that she was black and therefore legally had to sit in the back. I guess you take what you can get, right?
Illinois has just passed a law making book banning illegal, but Florida has encouraged such activity. Teachers are leaving the state wherever convenient and searching for employment in environments more amenable to education.
There is a chubby blonde from Georgia who has talked about keeping people from “blue” states who move in to be restricted from voting for five years so they can adjust to the Southern values. There is not any mention of this recently because of recent weather phenomena. This same thing held up a photo from Hunter Biden’s laptop showing him naked in a sex act. It went out live on CSPAN. I heard no right-wing outrage at this prurient display.
I must confess that I am unable to figure out why women in these red states tolerate the anti-abortion fervor down in those “Red States”. Then again, perhaps they are ALL born stupid and want company.
Critical Race Theory, we understand, is evil. So what is it? Well, the first step in finding out is to forget about any association with the Frankfurt School. It is not related. It is mingled with “Replacement Theory,” which claims to explain all our social ills. It works like this: Democrats want to import as many blacks and Hispanics as possible as they will vote for Democrats. However, since these races are mentally challenged, they need someone smart to organize and lead them and that’s where the Jews come in. Jews, everyone knows, are smart, so they lead the immigration.
As Trump has pointed out, “The only reason they are coming after me is that I stand in their way. They are coming after you.” Well, can you blame them for their loyalty? It really is a shame that Trump University got shut down before all the students became real-estate tycoons. Apparently, “they” don’t want more tycoons to give them trouble?
The MAGA, OR MAWA, folks like to intimidate people, but that is unlikely to work with prosecutors like Jack Smith. He spent some time prosecuting those guilty of war crimes, people like Pinochet and others I can’t pronounce or find, the ones from the Baltic states, and the like. He is also pretty Republican in the old sense; that is to say, not silly but also not a “fun guy”.
And one more point just to give an idea of why these people want out of their country: Back during the end of Reagen and the start of Bush I, we had an Ollie North camped out in the basement of the White House working a deal to smuggle arms to Honduras and cash to Iran (called Iran-Contra) with Bill Baar as Attorney General. Well, these contras were not pleasant people, but they did hate the Sandinistas who they described a “Communists”. These Sandanistas obtained a judgment against us in the international court, but the warmongers stayed in power in Honduras.
So, that’s enough of this drivel. It’s too hot, anyway.
AbsurdTimes’s Newsletter is a reader-supported publication. To receive new posts and support my work, consider becoming a free or paid subscriber.